“We are made for relationships, we are made for connection,” says psychologist, Collett Smart. “Being social is so much a part of what feeds our wellbeing. And when we don’t have connection, we end up lonely.”
In this Helping Hands panel discussion, Collett is joined by mental health author and speaker, Graeme Cowan, and Hannah Gair, founder of StrongerHERside podcast, to explore the importance of intentional community connection.
Quoting a recent Beyond Blue survey on how Australians view their wellbeing, Collett shares that although around 30% of Australians say that their wellbeing is excellent as a result of their sense of connection, this number is lower today compared to what it was following the same survey in 2022.
Among the 18-24-year-old age group, half of those surveyed not only said they felt lonely but also felt shame about their loneliness. And having wrongly concluded that their loneliness made them different to their peers, Collett explains, their assumption has the effect of compounding their sense of isolation even further.
Graeme adds that, in addition to an impact on our mental health, our lack of connection can also have a significant negative effect on our physical wellbeing.
“When people feel disconnected and lonely, it’s been shown that it has the same health effect as smoking fifteen cigarettes per day.”
Ultimately, Graeme says, community is about satisfying a fundamental need to belong. He shares his own personal experience of community with other like-minded people who meet once a month and have been doing so consistently – not only enjoying the common interest that brought them together in the first place but supporting each in life as well.
“It’s been going for twenty-five years,” Graeme explains, “and the reason is that sense of community, that bonding. And over that period of time, members have been through divorce, bankruptcy and even death. But they (the group’s gatherings) are a consistent thing that happen every month where you feel you belong.”
Hannah shares that it can also sometimes happen that our needs for community connection can change throughout the seasons of life. As a mum of a child living with a disability, Hannah highlights the importance of taking the time to intentionally look for the right connections for whatever stage or situation you find yourself.
“If you look at statistics for mothers who are raising children with disability, it varies between 60-80% of mothers actually feel isolated, and with isolation, can come a feeling of hopelessness and disconnectedness … it’s super-critical that community is paramount … paramount to getting through that journey.”
What is the best way to find the right community for you?
Collett summarises that our two simplest answers are to either join the community that appeals to us, or, if it doesn’t yet exist, start your own.
“Just put it out there,” Collett encourages, “that you would meet people in a public place; in a coffee shop, so that you’re safe about it. Meet people, because there are other people who are desperate for community, and they’re just waiting for someone to put their hand up and say, ‘Let’s start something!’”
#helpinghandstvau #makingtheworldabetterplace #paneldiscussion #impactmakers #impact #gamechangers #socialgood #tvshowforsocialgood #connection #community #communityconnection #intentionalcommunityconnection #collettsmart #raisingteens #graemecowan #ruok #hannahgair #stronghersidepodcast #becabbott
